Self-coaching is the process of guiding our individual growth and development, particularly through periods of transition, in both the professional and personal realms. It is a powerful skill set of tools and techniques that anyone can apply to create instant and sustainable changes. It is often used when individuals seek to regain control of their actions and beliefs, and therefore strive toward positive life changes.
Self-coaching starts with our attitude toward ourselves: How do we really see ourselves? Effective self-coaching involves seeing ourselves as a work-in-progress, being open to learning and change, and adopting a mindset that supports this perspective.
The self-coaching methodology aims at helping you generate changes in your daily life. It shows you how to identify and pursue your own goals and objectives through proper strategies, unlocking your potential as you develop your innate, creative, issue solving methods.
Advantages of Self-Coaching
Self-coaching is a great alternative when one-on-one coaching is not available. Some great advantages include:
- Increased awareness of your own strengths and capabilities
- Increased awareness of your thoughts, patterns and habits
- Understanding that you can choose which thought, pattern or habit supports you or holds you back
- Growth in self-confidence, self awareness, determination, motivation, and problem solving abilities
- Self-coaching may become an automatic response to challenges
A good self-coaching process will allow you to explore your thinking, ideas, and beliefs in order for you to create effective strategies so you get the results you want. It will also train you to think differently and enable you to take more control over your life. Most of all, self-coaching is a time to slow down, be mindful and check in with yourself and to determine what is right or best for you.
Essential Ingredients of Self-Coaching
The following factors are likely to increase your chances of coaching yourself effectively:
- Learn basic self-coaching techniques
- Use coaching exercises and forms to guide, monitor, sustain and evaluate progress
- Follow a sensible and clearly established self-coaching program rather than just trying to achieve change on impulse
Self-Coaching Tips
1. Write it down! Writing down your thoughts, feelings, ideas and plans not only increases your levels of motivation but also significantly increases the likelihood of your success. Getting the creative juices flowing leads to new ideas, solutions and possibilities!
2. Ask the right questions and wait for the answer. When it comes to self-coaching, ask questions that move you toward a solution rather than toward the problem. Becoming solutions-focused is one of the quickest ways of self-coaching yourself to success. A typical solutions focused question might be: What’s the easiest thing I could do right now? What’s the one thing that would get me started in the direction of the solution? How can I look at this another way? If I wasn’t afraid what’s the first thing I would do to solve this issue?
3. Be open to new ideas. One common outcome arising from behavioral training in schools and corporate life is many people immediately resist new ideas. My experience suggests that we learn through sometimes-painful experiences not to upset the proverbial apple cart. Be open to the new ideas that will come to you. Break the old patterns and let creative problem solving flow.
4. Self-celebrate! Don’t leave your success to fate or someone else for that matter. The more you embrace and acknowledge your real time successes and achievements, the more you build your own inner reserves of self-esteem and confidence in who you are. When you move hurriedly from one project to another without taking time to stop and take stock, you are robbing yourself of your own personal success and inner fulfillment. Take time out to record your achievements in writing no matter how small they might be.
5. Under promise and over deliver. Avoid flodding yourself with loads of things to do and then find yourself drowning in feeling overwhelmed. Very often this problem is rooted in a lack of self-confidence, which then manifests in seeking to gain approval by over committing yourself. Be realistic to yourself about what you can deliver -- under promise to others about what you can deliver -- and then over deliver it.
6. “No” is a complete sentence. To really embrace the full benefits of what can be gained from self-coaching, you’ll have to really get real about what and who you’ll need to start saying “No” to. The more you work on changing your life, the more you’ll see just how much “stuff” you routinely (and often subconsciously) “Yes” to. These things can block your productivity and success. Most success comes through not adding to our lives but by subtracting. What activities could you delegate or get rid of completely.
7. Lighten up! Own up to your mistakes and shortcomings. Owning up can catapult you into a more enlightened state -- in fact, it can literally lighten your load! Make a list of your hidden habits or patterns that really don't create the best for you. The more you own up to, the more your top strengths and skills shine and become available for use.
8. Using Compassion and Accountability. Focus on raising the sense of ownership around two basic issues: awareness and responsibility. As far as self-coaching goes, responsibility means accountability. The frequent drill of compassionately observing your thoughts and actions can result in increased accountability and subsequent desire to make realistic improvements.
9. Do less for more time. How could you do less for more? We waste a lot of time trying to master our weaknesses. Instead, find a master in an area or field and contact them. A great question is to ask “Who could do a much better job for me than I’m currently doing”?
10. Experience life to the max. The more richness and vitality you can find in the ordinary aspects of your everyday life, the better equipped you will be to handle the ups and downs.
11. Gratitude. Allow your ability to be thankful shine through in both the good times and the bad. We’ve all been there! Gratitude gives us the strength to find the good in every situation and grow in a much stronger way.
12. Get to the point. Getting to the point is in danger of becoming a lost art in the corporate world where taking responsibility is sometimes like being exposed to a highly contagious and career limiting disease! In this arena, I have again found that self-coaching works well with simple acts of observation. At the start of each activity, ask yourself: "What's the point of this?"
13. Natural Nourishment. With all of your hard work, how do you fill up your inner reserves? In other words, how are you naturally nourished? Everyone has something that allows them to replenish their energy and refuel their tank. For some it’s nature, for others it's a good book or music. Whatever it is, you’ve got to consciously make time for it in your busy schedule. Make a list of your natural nourishments and schedule them in your calendar weekly.
14. Small is the new big. Develop the skill of breaking your goals down into small steps that enable your project or goal to happen. Remember feeling overwhelmed by the enormity of many of your tasks and goals can create inertia and procrastination. Sarks micro movement wheel is a brilliant tool for setting in motion a series of small steps towards your goal. Here's a tip: On a blank piece of paper, draw a large circle with a smaller circle in the middle and then divide the circle into six equal segments. In the center circle, write down the goal you want to achieve. A “micro movement” is a small tiny action that can be completed within a time span of between 5 seconds and 5 minutes. Each segment of your circle represents a 5 second to 5 minute sequence. Now in each segment break the goal down into six smaller actions. Each action once taken will move you closer to the goal you are aiming to achieve.
15. Let success come to you. Striving can be such hard work. On this journey you may hit the point where whatever you try to do or put in place next just doesn’t work. When this occurs, follow this rule: Stop, get still, relax your grip and let go! The moment this happens you’ll be amazed at just how much good comes your way, what doors open up without much effort and what possibilities become suddenly available. Stop striving for success – Let it come to you.
Self-coaching skills, methodologies and principles offer a radically new perspective to organizations looking for effective and innovative training and development solutions for their people, managers and executives.
The nature of self-coaching as a learning and development model enables a different and operational approach to developing traditional 'intangibles' - for example positive behavior, integrity, humanity, ethics, mentoring, culture, emotional maturity, etc. - which are so vital for successful performance of modern organizations.
Our workshops, speaking events and executive coaching sessions are designed to plant the seeds that will transform the way your employees engage with you and your company – building culture, decreasing turnover, establishing leadership, creating accountability and increasing your profit.
For more information on how Powerhouse Learning can help your organization with a self-coaching model, please visit Powerhouse Learning or contact Brandie Hinen at brandie@powerhouselearning.com.